Have you ever...

said something that could loosely be interpreted as sexual and then out of nowhere, someone that you know but not really decides they wanna take the innuendo and run with it? Then you think the two of y'all are joking and you're play-flirting back and then you realize that this guy is totally serious because he asks where you live and you're all "WTF, when did this happen?"



I'm so there.




And this kid is not even cute enough to be talking to me the way he is. The only thing redeeming him was the fact that he had a cute dog but then I come to find out that he doesn't even have the dog anymore. sigh. I'm going to bed.

This is a blog about pancakes.

Seriously.


I've actually been craving them all week, but somehow in my head they are more work than french toast, so I've had french toast about 6 times this week.

Actually, pancakes make me sad recently. I think it's because I'm so homesick. Making pancakes would make me think of my mom and mommy is so far away. I cried all over the Mother's Day card I sent to her today.

I'm a pussy I know.

Speaking of pussies, have you seen Cassie's? That's the singer, I know most people don't know who the fuck the bitch is, but yeah. it's her. Her funbags and her poon have been floating all over the internet after somebody "hacked into her computer."

Come on now, don't be a whore for propaganda.

At first, it was just her titicacas, then surfaced a photo of her spread eagle with all her piercings gleaming in the light of the webcam.

Jesus, take the wheel.


This is TOTALLY not what I came her to talk about.

I'm gonna make a sex tape. That would speed up this whole 'becoming famous' thing, fo sho.

I kind of hate myself right now.

I miss him.

Not the him that cuddles with me, or that texts me just because he was thinking of me. Nope, not him.

I miss the other one. The one that broke my heart, the one that made me cry, the one I gave everything too.

The one that lied to me, that took me for granted and took advantage. The one who made me happiest, then turned around and caused me to feel the most hurt I've ever experienced.

And I feel stupid. Because after it all, I still wish he was here. I wish he was mine. And it still hurts. Hurts so bad.

They say in the end you always think of the beginning.. I'm thinking about the birthday cake I made, the Valentines text I got, the study sessions that didn't have any studying, the late night phone calls, the cuddling, October 24... I want 2008 back. I want him back.

I want us back.

And at the very same time I feel terrible because I have an amazing man in my life who cares about me and I'm really falling for him. Albeit a bit more carefully than last time, but falling nonetheless. And I never want for him to feel like he's sharing me or fighting for my heart because he doesn't have to... which contradicts everything I've said. I hate this.

so it's been a while..

Dearest blog, I apologize for neglecting you so. It's been a rough couple weeks.

Just wanted to say hi. 

hi.

that's all.

WOAH!

I have a follower!!!! that's nutso! who's crazy enough to follow my blog?? Well not crazy, I'm sure you're amazing. Well you have to be, you're associated with me.


You know, sometimes, when I think of how many awesome blogs there are, I feel like I'm wasting some kind of internet paper or something that could be recycled and used me for something more important.


but whatever. I have a follower. :D

I need a purpose.

so I've decided that I have no purpose.

Many of my friends blog, mostly fashion blogs. My blog is about my life.


which is pretty damn boring. At least I think so.

I really need to carry my macbook with me, so that I can blog random thoughts. I have so many and i forget so easily cause sometimes my brain acts crazy and I can't stop thinking or moving and everything runs together and then I forget and then I hate myself because I get so entertained by my thoughts and I wanna share them but I have forgotten and then I think about carrying cheesy which is the name of my mac (get it, cheesy mac?) but I need a new battery and he dies in like 15 minutes and what good what that do?


see?


I think I have ADD.

I really want a puppy. I wanna convince someone to get me one.


I saw my spiph today... it was amazing I've missed him so much. And finally my big brother is back. <3 I'm pretty sure this is what I came to post about but in my true form, I forgot.

My God, just shoot me.

I would really appreciate it if people stopped asking me who I'm looking at in the NFL playoffs.



The answer is no one. and the tears that well up in my eyes when you mention the National Football League should deter you from pressing further, but if you're one of those people who doesn't fucking get it, press on. break a young woman's heart.


Of course, more than it already is. I don't even want to revisit in any detail the fuckery that was the Cowboys vs. Eagles game that killed Dallas' chances at the playoffs, because it is far too painful. And if you can't understand then I hope you get sacked by an old lady in the grocery store and then I hope said lady shoves an entire hard salami up your ass because you are a fucktard with no empathy for a football fan in pain.


But of course, there's always next season. Oh yeah, goodbye Tony Romo. You've choked when it mattered most for the last time. Too bad you don't get to play in the awesome Cowboy Stadium. That shit is HOT.


I probably will watch the superbowl, because a true football fan wouldn't miss it, but it's gonna hurt. sigh.

have you ever wondered...

if artists just did whatever the fuck they wanted and it never really meant anything and art critics have gotten into the habit of trying to figure shit out and the artist is just like, "I put that pig there because bacon is delicious and I fucking love pigs" but people are referencing Animal Farm and Socialism and THE MAN then the artist is just like, "WTF"?

ALSO.

I was watching Taboo the other night about coming of age ceremonies and on the island of Vanuatu the men jump off a huge tower with vines tied to their ankles and plummet face down toward the Earth and they think that this is the origin of modern day bungee jumping and they tell this flowery story of how the tradition originated with some guy trying to kill his wife and she climbed up a tree and tied vines to her ankles and he went up the tree to totally murk that bitch but she jumped and he followed but he wasn't cool and didn't have vines tied to his ankles so he went SPLAT and whatnot when he hit the ground and nowadays the men build a huge tower* and jump off that shit to symbolize that they will never be tricked again(which to me is odd because if it were me I would have the women jump but without the vines to teach their asses a damn lesson).

*In this episode, the tower actually fell and killed a NatGeo camera man and a few of the men who were yet to jump. Which was totally not funny.